Is it me or this new health craze is resulting in a really unhealthy perspective in life? Everyday, my ears and eyes are being subjected to self-loathing and deranged illusions of females who insist that dieting will bring them happiness and inner peace. I can understand not being happy with your weight, body, and overall look. You know, everyone, one day or another, does not like the way they look. On many occasions, I’ve felt insecure and unhappy with my physical appearance. However, there is not amount of dieting that will guarantee you happiness.
As a teen, I was never happy with the way I looked. Also, I, had a very beautiful older sister who I was constantly compared to (we did look very similar) yet she, somehow, was always said to be the prettier of the two. I never really understood why, until the day a very honest boy gave me the bit of information I was lacking: “You look just like your sister but fat”. Lo and behold! I was fat! When did this happen and why did I suddenly hate myself? Before that moment, I had always considered myself pretty. I was different. I liked who I was. Unfortunately, due to some boy’s perspective of beauty, I was thrown into a loop. I wanted to be pretty. I wanted to like myself. Not once, did I take into consideration my personality or who I was as an individual. From then on, I was just fat. Losing weight, being healthy, that became my obsession. I set a goal, I would weigh 118 pounds. And I did! I reached my goal. I was thin but I did not feel pretty. I did not feel happy. You see, the whole idea of ”If I weigh said-amount-of-pounds, I’ll feel good about myself” doesn’t really exist. Happiness comes from acceptance.
I do not look like a model. I never will and looking a certain way will never bring me happiness. Today, I’m somewhat of an adult (really somewhat) I’ve come to accept myself for who I am. That doesn’t mean I don’t feel self-conscious and I don’t take care of my health. I’m just not defined by a number on a scale or by what I eat. I’m defined by my thoughts, my choices, and my actions. I could not possibly be happier.